Holy blast from the past!

OK, I was never a "Hanson" kind of girl. MmmBop disgusted me and so did they trio's lack of haircuts. I couldn't for the life of me understand why girls got in such a tizzy over these boys and their stupid song that didn't even make sense. I was an official Hanson Hater.
----------------------------------->fast forward<------------------------------------------
I believe it was my senior year in high school and I was watching vh1 as I often did. A particular video began playing fairly frequently and I heard the song and adored it. I could not believe my eyes though when I saw who the artist was. It was HANSON. An adult and trimmed up version but still Hanson nonetheless. My eyes and ears couldn't believe it, WOULDN'T believe it! This couldn't be! I was sworn to loathe these boys and their poppy songs. But this song was different it was called "Penny and Me" and it was such a far cry from MmmBop. I was converted.
Recently Hanson has a new album floating around the airwaves and again vh1. The 2 songs I've heard so far are great and I love surprising people when they listen to them in my car with me. SO, that being said, I just had to share with the rest of you too. Here it is, a most excellent song by the band, Hanson. Enjoy! xoxoxo

girl put your records on...

a perfect day...

 I want a record player


There's just something about listening to records that seems to vintage and lovely

 Growing up we had a huge old record player and my grandparents record collection...














...I would listen to all of them in one sitting; in love with the way they sounded and watching the needle work it's way to the center.

can this PLEASE be me??

the good ol' days

Records are so simple and pure.




From a time when life was simple and innocent...




...a time when boys courted girls and mothers wore pearls.

why shouldn't this be me someday??

I think it's time I look to make this happen.


I feel warm and happy just imagining it. 


And shouldn't everyone strive to feel warm and happy?

my favorite things

Being Monday and all...and since I failed last week...

• Peace Sign coming home TWICE this month!
• My first Spring season in 5 years
• not having to wear pants around the house
• getting ready for Easter 
• Watching cartoons with Caden
• WEARING FLIP FLOPS AGAIN!!!
• NHL playoffs
• catching up with Panda
• pancakes!

the end

You feel it coming. It's almost like the wind shifting directions. That slight switch where deep down in your gut you know he's changed his mind about things. His actions are different. He doesn't talk to you the same way. So do you ride it out and hope for the best or nip it in the butt? Unfortunately for me I'm the ride/hope type. It's a slow ride down a hill until you get the bottom and you're left with....yourself. Yourself and a brain on hyper-speed, thinking about what you could have done differently, how could this have happened again, was any of it real? You've been here before so you know you'll be fine. Life will go on. But you also know that before that happens you have to get through the steps. Everyone knows the steps: Pity, AngerMe, AngerYou, Hurt, Bitterness, Revenge.
Pity- this includes the "why me?"'s and all other self-depressing questions. Your logic tells you these things are lies but somehow these poisonous thoughts manage to creep in and hold you down. You think of every comment or questions imaginable to rip yourself apart. And nothing anyone else says can really help you feel differently.
AngerMe - this version of anger is the type you feel against yourself. Being mad for letting yourself get into such a vulnerable position in the first place. Feeling frustrated for letting yourself put your guard down again. The reality of it is, there's no way you could have known that things would have happened the way they did. But a part of you still wants to kick yourself in the ass for opening up.
AngerYou - this is total, all out anger at the other person. "How could he do this?" and "I can't believe he just doesn't care". Your insides get hot just thinking about what happened. Just his name makes you furious.
Hurt - probably the most healthy and normal of the steps. It's not made up or over exaggerated. You're just hurt. The situation makes you feel sad and bruised. I happened, there's nothing you can really do about it, so you let it go and let yourself hurt.
Bitterness - I'm too familiar with this one. Comments fall out of your mouth like "Bring on the cats!" and "I'm going to be a lesbian instead" and "I'm never dating again". It almost makes you feel better to just blurt them out, knowing somewhere in your mind that it's not true at all. It's all a facade....a facade that only really fools yourself.
Revenge - bring your baseball bats! Okay not really, but you think about it. Your mind makes up all these little scenarios of way to get some revenge. You feel the need to inflict the some kind of pain on the other person, hoping to return the favor they've done you. Now, if you're an immature IDIOT you might act on this. I don't suggest that. It's best to check these thoughts and keep them at just that, THOUGHTS.
They happen in any order, last for any given amount of time and there are plenty of song lyrics for your facebook status that represents each one, perfectly. The more you've experienced them the better you get at controlling them. And after you've gone through them, you're free. You wake up one morning and feel light again; the storm has passed. The end is over. {sigh}

I'm choosing happiness over suffering, I know I am. I'm making space for the unknown future to fill up my life with yet-to-come surprises.

...this is just one of my favorite quotes from the latest book I read; Eat. Pray. Love. I haven't seen the movie yet so I was excited to read the book first. Now, I started reading this book when I finished the Potato Peel Pie book...which was quite a while ago. It's not a particularly hard read, in fact, I quite enjoyed it's pace. But I still found myself being a little frustrating with my speed, or lack there of, in reading this book. Life clearly had a reason for this. {silly life} Over the past month or so it was as if I was reading the exact parts of the book that I needed to read at that very moment. And of course I didn't realize this until after I finished it today.
As far as my recommendation goes, I can't praise this book enough. I wasn't really in need of inspiration when I started reading it, but still found myself being uplifted by so many parts of it. My copy is officially dog-eared a few times over. And while the author is a woman (Elizabeth Gilbert) it's not an overly girly book. It really speaks to anyone who has felt lost, lonely, or in need of some guidance. It doesn't throw religion on the reader either, which I liked. She writes about what worked for her and recognizes that there are many ways to finding oneself.
I'm sooo glad I read this book when I did and I hope the movie won't be a huge disappointment (I'm talking to YOU Julia Roberts). I highly suggest it to anyone looking for a great read. Whether your in a good or bad place there is some really great stuff in this book. And if nothing else, maybe it will inspire you to look into traveling more or even learning a new language!

ciao bellas!

my favorite things

My favorite things as of late:

• my rain boots
• thunder storms
• the TODAY show
• the kids I nanny

wants

I'm beginning to feel as though life isn't about getting what you want. It's about getting what you get and finding a way to be ok with that. I can't control the universe, I can only control me. And me is only human. Me can only do so much with what I've got. So what can I do about it really? I'm not sure that there's much. Just because I know what I want, doesn't mean the rest of the world will ever align with that. I can't force a theatre to hire and pay me. I can't force someone to want to be with me. I can't force people to treat me the way I treat them. So...do I just control me and hope for the best? I'm beginning to think so.

I wore a skirt today and...it was amazing. I felt lighter; like I had shed my winter coat of fur. I felt free; unrestricted. It was just what I needed.

3 kinds of people

Recently I heard someone say that there are 3 kinds of people: The Gullible, The Cynical, and The Healthy. I quickly began trying to figure out which of these 3 people I am. I quickly realized that I've been all 3 within my short life.  I've let people in too soon and allowed them to know the inner workings of myself before really know who they are. So many times this led to being taken advantage of and hurt very badly by these people. I have also been extremely cynical. There were times when there was no joy or happiness and everyone was an enemy. It was easier to protect myself if I didn't let anyone in and remained closed off. So much of these 2 sides of me came and went in college....a coincidence? I think not. I let the wrong people too far into my life and kept the good people at arms length. Backwards...I know. And it wasn't until last May that I started to find a happy balance. A balance between trusting entirely and closing all my doors; The Healthy. So what is my healthy? My healthy is a teeter-totter really. I think it will always tip to the gullible side a little more though. I guess in my mind it makes more sense to take a chance on someone, rather than closing myself off to something that could be great. There will always be those people though who I will need to be closed off to from the start and I'd like to think that my experiences so far allow me to recognize them quickly. I know I will most certainly get hurt, but that's LIFE. No one said it was perfect or easy or happy all the time. So here's to being The Healthy! Now all I have to do is keep my teeter-totter there and not let it fall to one side or the other.  

my favorite things

Since it's Monday and all...

• my new mark Zip Around bag!
• having adult conversations
• quilting with the women who loved my grandma
• sunshine pouring into my windows
• pancakes!
• reruns of True Life