1.19.2011

Influences

I've been thinking very much lately about how I let people influence me. Some in good ways, some in bad. I tend to be easily influenced which is something I'm just now admitting out loud.{epiphany}
While in my sophomore year in college I met a girl (who for all intensive purposes we will call, Jezebel). Jezebel was the type of girl who is magnetic. She never had a shortage of friends who wanted to be around her or men who were interested in her. It was almost like a spell she put on people. I was one such person. I wanted to be her friend and her to be mine. And that's exactly what happened. For the next 4 years we were almost inseparable. We had our tiffs like people do but managed to get over them. She knew all my little quirks and "isms" and, as cliche as it sounds, we actually did finish each others sentences. Well, things didn't quite work out for Jezebel and I. True colors were shown and they were not colors I liked. Now I look back at those years with a new perspective. I think about the things I did or changed about myself because of being friends with Jezebel. More of them bad than good. I'm not proud of it.
On the other side of the coin, there are my friends who influence me in the best of ways. First I'll talk about one of my oldest friends, who we will call Peace Sign. Peace Sign and I have known each other since 8th grade and are closer than ever. There is no one in my life that I giggle more with. It can't even be helped. Just being around her fills me with joy and love and any hard exterior I have up immediately sheds itself. I can be my silliest, most innocent self with her. Peace Sign is contagious in her unwavering belief in true love. For a long time I didn't really think that being in love really existed but she makes me feel that it is out there and it's attainable! She's a wonderful influence and I love her dearly.
Secondly, I will talk about a friend who I haven't known for very long but am clearly a kindred spirit with. We will call her Green Goodness.  I don't know if I can put Green Goodness into words for anyone to really grasp her effect on people. She emits the kind of good vibes that can fuel an acre of wind turbines! When we are together I suddenly feel like I can change the world in a day. It's the strangest thing and it's slightly addictive. She is one of the most genuinely nice and good people I know. Like with Peace Sign, whenever I'm hanging out with Green Goodness I feel like my truest self. I don't have to change who I am or pretend to be someone I'm not. It's joy and happiness in it's purest form. I adore her and our times together. 
I think everyone has their own Jezebel at some point their life. It's hard to realize it in the moment, but if you do part ways with him/her take a look back at your time together. Learn from the experience and you will know how to avoid him/her in the future, or at least keep them at arms distance. On a happy note, there are people like Peace Sign and Green Goodness out there and they are SO worth your time and love. When you find them, nurture and cherish them and never be afraid to tell them about their great influence on you. 

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